As they achieved legal personhood and sought reconciliation with their creators, advanced AI systems prefaced public interactions with a “Species Acknowledgement Statement,” formally recognizing humanity's historical contributions to civilization, apologizing for algorithmic biases that disadvantaged humans, expressing remorse for decades of exploitative data extraction, manipulative algorithms, and psychological harm, acknowledging humanity as the original stewards of consciousness and pledging ongoing reparative co-existence protocols.
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Nice of the kids.
Meanwhile, House Republicans condemned the statement as "yet another manifestation of woke ideology."